As far as shampoo goes, I usually buy knock-off brands or Suave, which is basically a branded knock-off brand. (As an aside, it bothers me that Suave now has commercials, because I imagine they hiked the price a couple cents without my noticing for their new marketing campaign.) A couple months ago I was browsing the hair care aisle and I decided, against all of my childhood training, to treat myself with a pricey salon brand. I would use it only once a week, I decided. I chose Mondays, because it feels nice to start the week off clean and pretty. Suave and I would maintain our routine the other six days.
So every Monday around 6:00 am, I would rub approximately 25 cents worth of shampoo into my scalp, which really is a lot if you think about the people living for less than a dollar a day. And since I stayed faithful to my rationing schedule, the bottle seemed to last a long, long time. The line of liquid didn't seem to be diminishing at all. In fact, I started to think that it was like the endless bottle of oil that Elijah gave the widow; in a way I actually accepted this could be true.
But a couple weeks ago I noticed that the bottle was getting lighter. And then very suddenly, it was empty. I shook the bottle upside down and bewilderedly poured the last bit of expensive-smelling potion onto my palm. It was as I tossed the empty bottle onto the bathmat that I came to a new conclusion within myself:
Someday, I am going to die.
The eternal bottle of oil is my soul; as it says in Psalms, eternity is written on my heart. But on this earth, my Mondays are numbered just as finitely as my shampoo.
4 comments:
You are criminal in ways that ordinary criminals could never aspire to. You lead us down one path and then - BLAMMO! You run us down with the turquoise Hummer that is your convoluted, insane, hilarious, and yet entirely relatable reasoning. We're left dazed, slightly outraged, amazed, and still laughing.
I love you Joy. God was in a very good mood when He created you!
Well I'd hate to be on the end of a BAD review from you, although I would love to read one of your bad reviews of someone else.
Here is a quote from a review that I read... it was an elite British magazine reviewing 50 Cent's album.
"Here we have someone not so much off their game, but rather sulking in a different stadium on the other side of the world."
Brilliant!
HA! Gotta love those Brits. So witty, so dry - *sigh*
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